The dentist wants my money
She said I need a couple of crowns so we scheduled it
I showed up and she said $1,000
I said, don’t I have insurance?
Yes, but this is your part to pay
Everybody wants my money
I had to pay for the campsite in the forest I am taking the
kids to for vacation
The initial investment was modest
Turns out I did not have all the camping gear I needed
REI wanted some of my money
Amazon wanted money for the books we will read as a family
and for the mosquito repellant
and for the inflatable mattress
the gas station wants my money and they collude with the
supermarket to get it
if I am loyal to the supermarket I can get 10-cents, or
20-cents, off, per gallon
(again by being loyal to the fuel provider)
What’s the profit margin on that gas?
The supermarket definitely wants my money
And I have been uber loyal over the years
The store is clean and comfortable with great variety
I enjoy grocery shopping and often buy too many groceries
Heads of salad sometimes rot inside of my refrigerator
It’s so good to have fresh fruit around
Until you feel like a consumerist pig because the bananas
and tangerines have rotted on the counter
Half used onions turn in my crisper drawer because I never
turned, to them
Everybody wants my money
Including the restaurants
When energy wanes and instant gratification spikes I have a
multitude of choices
The onion can wait
Mexican food. Now.
Of course Costco pulls me from the supermarket
My family is not big enough, I am not big enough, to warrant
Costco
That won’t stop me
I now buy kitchen trash bags every 2.5 years
I buy granola bars every six months
Everybody wants my money
The roof over my family’s heads costs money
The power in our home
The water
The vehicle I drive
Insurance!
I have never once in my life made a claim on my own auto
insurance and yet…
They want my money
They get my money
What do I get for my money?
Funny commercials with lizards and geckos and Flo
Gee. Thanks.
Everybody wants my money
Bernie Sanders wanted my money last year
For his, no, our ideas, to compete in a moneyed
system
I was happy to give Bernie some money
It is the best money I have spent in years, maybe in my
lifetime
So it is that Ironstache Randy Bryce needs my money
Elizabeth Warren needs my money, (and deserves some,)
The men looking to unseat the corrupt Messers. Rohrbacher
and Issa want my money
The financial planner wants his cut of my money
Eddie Vedder wants my money
(Or, he wants the Surfrider Foundation to have it, anyway)
When you endure a relentless barrage of moneylust, you kind
of need some Eddie Vedder when you can get it
All manner of service employees want my money
I can’t say no
I live in the 18-25% range
Like 98% of the work force, they are not paid enough and
oddly, I get to affect that
Wait-am I forced to affect that?
Capitalism is
Capitalism wants my money…and I can’t say no
I won’t say no
I haven’t said no
I’m weak
I admire those who have said no
Everybody wants my money
The bar wants my money
The American Youth Soccer Organization wants my money
The car wash wants my money
The coffee industry wants my money
Frozen yogurt too
Sprint demands my money
I don’t begrudge how necessary our devices have become
I begrudge the profit margin in the telecom industry
Norton antivirus wants my money
iTunes and Spotify and Pandora are in a race to gain my
money on a subscription model
an open ongoing source of cash releases corporate capitalist
endorphins
The YMCA wants my money
My ex-wife wants my money
After school care wants my money
Ireland and Cuba want my money and it can only be a matter
of time
Dude on the bike with the dreadlocks outside the Panda
Express wants my money
Groupon wants to give me a discount to get my money
(Did they cut the actual price or was it inflated first in
order to sustain the sacred profit margin?)
Amazon offers me everything in exchange for my money
Everything
Walmart absolutely positively does not get my money
Demand Progress wants my money, sometimes for informing me
how bad a company Walmart is
Rest In Peace Aaron Swartz – Your story makes my heart so
heavy
Holidays want my money
On behalf of See’s candy and Hallmark and firecrackers and
Butterball turkeys and Toys R Us and increased wattage and liquor
Hair restoration wants my money
All manner of age remediation wants my money
My money is wanted in the name of family safety and security
Madison Avenue wants my money by fear and by sex primarily
Netflix and Amazon want my money, the unread books on my
shelf be damned
New wants my money-Old can pound sand
Technology wants my money
The aftermarket wants my money
Pep Boys and Firestone and Castrol and Tune-Up Masters want my dollars
The fitness gurus and purveyors of equipment want my cash
The vitamin makers will sustain my joints for money
The illustrious businessmen of health care, with some help
from the doctors, will help me as I grow infirm, for money
The estate planner wants my money and one day the funeral
director will too
I am not planning on paying him
I prefer to retire a grifter
